Horsehair Lace

My WIP (working title) “Kai” started off with an element of expanding the Wizarding World that featured tying in the Old Ways to some magic and areas where a patron could provide access to particular magic, and then I kinda-sorta accidentally tapped into some Faces of Deities. (The full details are a little bit beyond this individual post right now, but it gets a bit inter-pantheon if you will with fictional tweaking for possible modern stuff.)

During one of the ‘future’ sections that’s a good three years after the start of the fic (it’s aiming for a second chance arc), I’ve got a riff on one of those Advent prompt memes where the focus is the 12 Days of Yule (gets slightly interrupted in the last few days). The basic idea of “Xmas-y sex toys/games/experimentation” of the usual Advent style turned into “guess we can’t avoid talking about that when this was behind the door” and working out some baggage. Most nights will either get a mythological or direct deity reference attributed to the item behind the door.

Example: [Plot spoilery events providing context for why a blindfolded activity is here. Even a summary is too long for this #long fic.] Day 3 will involve an evening activity, in which I lift an actual acting class exercise I’ve done [walking someone with their eyes closed around a town] and have Percy walk Oliver around a local outdoor area while he’s basically blindfolded. The barebones look heavy-handed, but I think it’ll feel a little less on the nose with the spacing in the story (literally, years have passed between the initial events and this).

Alright, so the title of this post and how “Kai” relates to all this. My first set of notes about a different night in this section included what might happen if there were a pair of ‘lacey knickers’ (and a redo for what’s probably going to happen instead). Then, the thought process went something like –  lacey >> horsehair lace >> mare!Loki >> I’ve got the attention of Lady Loki. Hence reblogging Silence’s Virtual Temple vids.

Good Enough.

I had a very distinct moment of starting to reblog the cross-post on tumblr before I realized it’d be more appropriate over here. (Granted, I haven’t intersected with the Kemetic community in well over three years, but the basic idea fits with my recent lack of activity in the vaguely Norse flavored something-or-other where I am.)

Mystical Bewilderment

Alternative Title: The Kemetic Community needs to up its content game.

This past week, I attended a leadership conference through my job. This is the second year that I’ve gone and as a result, there will be a few posts based on things I learned about at the conference. As always, as I listened to the various leaders from various countries and background present, I took studious notes, not necessarily for myself, but because I wanted to take what I was learning and use that to help the wider community.

TTR is right – the community does need to do better. And if that means I can impart, perhaps, some form of wisdom to one person at the very right time because I spent two days wearing uncomfortable clothes watching people talk about leadership? Then, I’m fine with that. I’ll go next year and the year after until I finally…

View original post 1,843 more words


Back in Feb 2017, I found myself in upg waters that I was very sure would be shredded for the historical inaccuracy and Weirdness of it if I were to share it publicly. Yes, I’ve shared some out there upg before and admitted when it was no longer relevant, but some people get a bit touchy and protective of Deities. Not to mention the Hellenic bit and accusations of hubris, and it was less risky to wait and see if this was another case of miscommunication before sharing anything.

From my notes:

Njord / Poseidon. From what I can tell, there was some sort of inter-pantheon Agreement […]. I think it might be a case of conflicting truths from more than one version of events simultaneously happening, so I’m not quite sure about the why or how it benefits both pantheons.

Like I said, I am very aware that this is not exactly typical upg. I can’t really point to any historical, lore, or cultural overlap justification, and I am not saying that these Faces are somehow better than more traditional and well-known Faces. This isn’t erasing or writing over Their respective mythologies about spouses, consorts, lovers, and the like. Quite frankly, I don’t expect this to really catch on or be seen by anyone other the handful of blog readers here.

I expect there will be people who don’t agree with this on the basis of inter-pantheon relationships, the fandom like quality of ‘shipping’ Deities, and the projection of human gender and sexuality on Deities. You know, those are fair points and there’s nothing wrong with questioning this. Personally, it turned out to be a way of interacting with Poseidon outside of Hellenismos without outright doing a Norse-Hellenic mashup.

2019 Divination

These are the cards drawn for the overall year of 2019. Deck: Flowers of the Night Oracle from Cheralyn Darcey.


Dark Moon – Positive

Night Blooming Daylily (Creation)

Creativity in all its forms, including the creation of partnerships, friendships, and romantic matchings, as well as physical artistic and creative pursuits are all inspired under the energy of this flower.


Full Moon – Be Wary Of

Rain Lily (Restore)

There is a change for the better coming, an opening up to new possibilities, and you are right on the path to benefit. Things are moving now, and the direction is in your favor, but you must be prepared to compromise a little. The timing may not be exactly to your liking, but the outcome will be worth any extra waiting or work on your part. Challenges are over-reactions and hastiness.


Hopes for 2019

2019 Divination

To save time and mental energy during the reading itself for 2019 (‘the year ahead’ type), I got the names for the cards I pulled for each month and the overall year (roughly speaking, a positive and cautionary warning) without delving into the specifics of the card’s meaning. I need to go back and get the relevant info before I can share a little bit of the year ahead results with pics. I might try to have some sort of #divination and communication post once a month, but I can’t make a guarantee (from one month to the next, I may not have clearance to share publicly).


While I associate it with People Who have Left (and continuing to knit is a bit of a shoutout without officially honoring Them), it’s also a somewhat relaxing hobby. Somewhat aka ‘wtf does that abbreviation mean’, ‘guess I’m taking a break because the cat decided she needed to sleep on the yarn, the project itself, and try to become one with the needles’, ‘casting on is generally a once per project deal, so why are you assuming I remember how to do that after knitting this ____ for three months’, and ‘why do these patterns assume I have Every needle so I can easily switch out in-progress, do you know how expensive interchangeable kits are’. I would like to aim for a #knitting post once a week (hopefully with pics).

Misc. Thoughts

Kink. Gender. Queer. Service. There can be an overlap with polytheism (devotional power dynamics, f’ex), but some of it is more me poking at things I also fall under or run into (#kinky and/or bdsm, #trans or gnc). I’m not an educator, and I certainly can’t speak on behalf of a community, but I might go stir-crazy keeping everything to myself. I already have a few #reviews and opinions posts in mind (two books), and fingers crossed, I hope to have the funds for something off my book list this year. I’d also like to aim for one of these posts once a week.

2018 in Review

[Thelatestkate: Drawing of a multicolored ferret with the phrase, “I know it wasn’t easy, so thanks for sticking around for another year.”]

Trying to think back over 2018, it feels hazy and nebulous like 2017. Finally reached a point where I realized I had slipped into an unsafe eating pattern during 2017 and needed to stop that (fun fact, there’s subclinical and clinical starvation). Some People were still finalizing Their Leaving, and Someone (currently unable to name publicly) surprised me by dropping in with an interest in Adoration (less reciprocal obligations and different offerings compared to veneration or honoring).

My grandfather’s cancer diagnoses, chemo and radiation treatments, and my grandparents wound up with a second dog after years of letting Raven be an only child (after Sweetheart passed sometime in undergrad). My grandfather and great-aunt’s unexpected passings. My grandmother has started preparing for selling the house and downsizing (somewhere in town) sometime in 2019. Trying to help her navigate turning on and using the computer for the small number of necessary tasks that involve online sites – checking grandfather’s email, online bank statements – is a special kind of frustrating because she doesn’t really want to learn how to do it (fingers crossed that she goes to the intro to computers classes in the new year).

Fanfic as coping. Fanfic as realizing that I may not be interested in a certain dynamic, but it’s still rather easy to write it. Fanfic as a way to connect to certain histories. Claiming my first prompt on ao3 (and realizing that giving the character a 200+ year lifespan in this au might require finishing the draft in 2019 despite wanting it done by 31 Dec for character reasons). Fanfic as realizing a boom-and-bust method of having ideas and skeletal drafts but struggling to finish a story might be something other than laziness (Mental Illness pondering that deserves its own post). Past-me was smart to come up with a chapter uploading schedule in order to stagger it all out, but past-me was not smart in thinking I would get that many drafts done this year.

Original fiction? In my Google docs? (It’s more likely than you think.)

I have a somewhat hazy memory of voting for the first time in 2012 in the fall semester of my Freshmen year of undergrad, but it’s kind of shoved in among all kinds of other firsts, Adulting issues, and focusing on my studies during college memories from undergrad. I know I voted to re-elect Obama, but I honestly don’t remember if I voted again until 2016 (Sanders wasn’t an option anymore, so I bit the bullet and voted for Hillary Clinton). Basically, I think this past Nov was the first time I voted in a midterm, and let me tell you, that was disappointing as fuck in a rural, majority Republican county. But I made sure I was still registered, did my candidate + issue homework, and got my ass to the polls, so I did the best I could do.

Honorary shoutout to Tumblr’s content policy update and the ensuing purge effective 17 Dec 2018. I’m trying to make my remaining accounts and this WP work, but I can’t make any promises about not trying any alternatives out in 2019. (Follow certain users to Dreamwidth? Follow people seeking to recreate the better, early 2000s side of tumblr at Figure out if it’s worthwhile following kinky bloggers to bdsmlr, qink, MojoFire, or other places?) *shrug* We’ll see.

[Source: User zadiest: i refuse to die until things are better and that is a threat]

Import Progress

It took somewhere in the range of 4 – 5 days for my–angel–of–music to import, so I manually cross posted and backdated some (but not all) of the content for the-unholy-pentagram. I’ve got tags and Categories for both (parented under Fossilized Leaves, for archival posts). (Why? Perhaps it’s just a quirk in my brain, but it makes sense for content that spans more than sideblog or actually fits with other tags as well.)

the-unholy-pentagram: Posts from a shrine for the Infernal Five from a pov of theistic Satanism, starting in June 2015 (queue will run out this month). Lilith, Eve, Baphomet (Satan), Belial (the Devil), and Samael.

By doing it by hand, I was able to control the categorization and tagging for the-unholy-pentagram, so I temporarily have a bunch of Uncategorized stuff in new tags for my–angel–of–music. Some tags will be combined, while others will be kept (see below). It does seem like a lot of work on this side, but I find it easier to edit tags here in WP rather than on tumblr, so I’m just going to leave my tags alone for another import for just-another-vanic-shrine (for Frey, Freya, Nott, Sunna, and Njord).

Tags that already existed:

  • admin note
  • offerings
  • altar or shrine
  • path resources

Tags that will be edited to fit existing WP tagging:

  • writings –> writing as an offering
  • Applied Luciferianism Project –> writing as an offering

New tags thanks to this blog:

  • writing prompt
  • luciferian ally

Tags that will be combined into my–angel–of–music:

  • Peacock Angel: For all your peacock needs.
  • Angel of Music: Violin imagery, music, etc; classical music
  • Phantom: Phantom of the Opera associations
  • Mockingjay Rebellion: Mockingjay associations, rebellion, resistance, etc.
  • a light in the darkness: Mental illness, depression, coping, etc.
  • Faces
  • snake
  • apples
  • lightning
  • winter
  • angels

Import Attempt

The potential benefit of tumblr’s update is that I’m being forced to clean house and figure out if I really want to keep certain posts and sideblogs. I don’t really have space on my laptop to download and keep everything for every blog, so I’m trying out the Importer on a small blog, but I can’t guarantee I’ll want to import every single one.

In hindsight, I should’ve gone with the one post url archive blog rather than the one that’s ‘In Progress’ (+150 posts), but I’ll just have to see what happens now. I don’t know if my tagging system will run into interference or what because most of the pages I’m running in to take the stance of not having an existing WP that will be affected by an import.

I’m honestly not sure if it’ll just import to something ‘behind the scenes’ on my end, or if readers will suddenly have a bunch of posts (162), or what. I thought this through just enough to try it, but it wasn’t until I was staring at the spinning wheel of the progress beginning that I realized I did not think this through enough. So, this is a preemptive apology should things get a bit wacky.

For people who remember the posts about updates and Leaving, it may seem a bit odd to see certain People suddenly being talked about again, but I don’t want to wholesale lose archived shrine sideblogs. The import in progress is for: my–angel–of–music; a now archived shrine for Lucifer back when I did some blogging about being a Luciferian ally (2015).

2017 in Review

Most of this year has been People (re)negotiating debt, arranging to Leave, and/or finally Leaving. It’s not even completely new news because old announcements take time to be set into motion in some cases.

There’s a nebulous category of people I can venerate (or honor, sometimes They differentiate the two) without officially being ‘here’. What shifts around as being okay to do is a bit too unsettled for sharing on the blog, as it’s rather exhausting to go back and forth about being able to xyz let alone sharing the back and forth publicly.

There are new People Who either don’t want to be talked about online or aren’t ready for online disclosure just yet. (While a part of me would love to share stuff about Some People, it just may not happen at all.)

If I meticulously go through my notes about 2017, I could probably find something a bit more tangibly memorable. However, the big elephant in the room is that I’m in self-induced stagnation. I’ve been too afraid of change to take the necessary steps to make my life better – unemployed, courting depression, too relieved that I’m bogged down in coping mechanisms instead of being actively suicidal ideation to set my own foot down.

I know my People have somewhat of a direction for me to aim for, and I know I need to change shit. Doing is different from knowing. I need to get the shit I was supposed to get done in 2017 done in 2018. Some People have been patiently waiting; Others have been doing Their own thing until I get my shit done.

The following is a more humorous way to greet the New Year:

[tumblr user moxperidot: 2018 starts with a full moon. 2018 is year of the dog. i’m onto you werewolves] (Source.)

Vikings + Headcovering

[Source. Transferring a headcovering post (Dec 2018 tumblr purge), but backdating to 16 Oct 2017.]


Do any Heathens out there practice any sort of veiling/religious attire? I know veiling is somewhat common in Hellenic Polytheism, and I’m curious if those of us on the Germanic side of the world had anything similar going on. Seems like there isn’t any historical precedent, not that one is necessarily required.

Maybe I’m just watching too much Vikings, but I feel like a braid of some kind could be a possibility…


Historical Heathens actually did sometimes wear various types of headcoverings back in the day, because it’s cold there and sometimes it’s just practical to keep your hair out of your face. That said, it’s pretty uncommon for modern Heathens to do it for religious reasons.

I’m pretty sure @sigynsdottir covers for secular purposes and has a bunch of resources on covering in a culturally/religiously sensitive way, so they might be worth talking to.

As for other religious attire, wearing a mjolnir pendant is both a historical and modern thing. Some (mostly American) kindreds wear period garb to gatherings, but that’s far from universal.


This is my main resource for Viking headcoverings from a historical perspective. The main question that comes up from it is whether it’s pre or post Christian ultimately. It would make sense that it may not be, as covering your head for warmth would make sense in the region.

It’s still very common in European folk costume, so it’s not unprecedented to do it outside Muslim or Jewish contexts. Most are probably from Chrsitian-era covering norms, but if you want the pagan origins you can find PDFs of this book online about the Greek origins of it. (I have one I could email you, but I know I got it online… somewhere…)

As for sensitivity to other cultures, I’ve written about that a lot before under my headcovering tag on here. If you have other specific questions, just let me know! I enjoy answering asks about it and would be willing to talk on Tumblr messenger as well if you wish.

I mostly cover for secular reasons because none of my Gods ever showed interest in it as a devotion but it still benefits me personally. Others have had Gods show interest, so – it may depend on your relationship in question. If I can’t or don’t want to cover at the moment, braids are my most common second option.

Oddly from everything I’ve read (and I don’t have the sources for it right now) the TV show Vikings is as accurate historically as we can get to period hairstyles and they’re also very fun and not that hard to do. This lady on Youtube has good tutorials on how to copy the hairstyles from the show. Given how most Heathens I know engage with their Gods, they’d probably be just fine with it.