Kneeling Before the Gods (cross post)

[Cross posted from a sideblog. Originally posted on 4 Dec 2017 and tagged #community.]


Can we stop treating kneeling before gods as if it’s some sort of dirty, disgusting, shameful thing only weak and foolish people do?

Kneeling is more than a physical action: It’s a gesture, it’s a show of trust. It’s putting yourself into a vulnerable position out of respect and trust for your deity. For some people, it’s about pushing past emotional or even physical boundaries. Kneeling is physically uncomfortable to me, but I have done it a couple of times, and will continue doing it, because it’s a huge show of trust for me.

I worship my deities. I honor Them, I give to Them, and sometimes, I kneel before Them. If I were weak, I wouldn’t even TRY. There’s no way I would trust my deities on that level. It’s not weakness that compels me to honor them: It’s loverespect, and trust.

Sure, piety can be taken to the extreme, but people such as Galina Krasskova and Timothy Jay Alexander do not speak for us all. They do not represent us.

Being a recon-leaning or ‘full recon’ (is that even the right way to put it? D:) isn’t a bad thing. Being a judgmental, hateful, bigoted assface about it is.

There’s nothing wrong with kneeling before your gods.

There is nothing wrong with choosing to capitalize references to Them.

There is nothing wrong with choosing to “worship” them versus “working with” them.

So stop ridiculing people who do.


This is especially true if (specifically talking about Heathenry) you have historical references to people kneeling and prostrating in prayer. (Someone even took advantage of this to kill a guy while he was praying.)

Rune Poem (cross post)

[Cross posted from a sideblog. Originally posted on 11 Aug 2018 and tagged #seeds of love (for offerings).]


Óst min, kyss mik
‘My love, kiss me’

A love poem to a Scandinavian lover.

Source: B465, before 1198

(via gasoline-selfesteem)

Sigyn & Lore (cross post)

[Cross posted from a sideblog where it was originally posted on 25 Nov 2017.]

Ask: Me again – I’ve seen references to a story about how Sigyn and Loki met each other in several places, but I can’t seem to find a record of it anywhere. Is there a surviving story about that, or is there just a ‘mythology fanon’ edition that’s commonly accepted as fact?  the-grey-hunt



No, there is no surviving story about this from Old Norse literature. I’m not aware of any story about them meeting, so I don’t know where the story that you found comes from. For better or worse, it’s very easy to be completely exhaustive with regard to Sigyn, because there is so little lore about her. Here is a list of every reference to Sigyn in Norse mythology that I have been able to find. Since a lot of people have questions about Sigyn, I’ve decided that while this may be overkill for answering your question, others might find an exhaustive list of sources useful.

  • Völuspá

Þar sitr Sigyn
þeygi um sínum
ver velglýjuð

‘There sits Sigyn (under Hveralundr, with Loki)
but not, of/concerning her 
husband, happy.’

  • Lokasenna (epilogue): 

Sigyn, kona Loka, sat þar ok helt munnlaug undir eitrið. En er munnlaugin var full, bar hon út eitrið, en meðan draup eitrit á Loka.

‘Sigyn, Loki’s wife, sat there and held a washbasin under the venom. But when the washbasin was full, she poured the venom out, and meanwhile the venom dripped on Loki.’

  • Gylfaginning “About Loki Laufeyjarson”:

Kona hans heitir Sigyn, sonr þeira Nari eða Narfi.

‘His wife is named Sigyn, their son is Nari or Narfi.’

  • Gylfaginning “Loki bound”

…en Sigyn, kona hans, stendr hjá honum ok heldr mundlaug undir eitrdropa. En þá er full er mundlaugin, þá gengr hon ok slær út eitrinu, en meðan drýpr eitrit í andlit honum.

‘…but Sigyn, his wife, stands next to him and holds a washbasin under the venom drops. But then when the washbasin is full, she goes and pours out the venom, and meanwhile the venom drips onto his face.’

  • Skáldskaparmál

In the beginning of Skáldskaparmál she is listed among the deities who are present when they host Ægir. Later in the list of kennings for Loki, ver Sigynjar ‘husband of Sigyn’ is mentioned.

  • Nafnaþulur

In Nafnaþulur, the name Sigyn is listed under names of Ásynjur and a list of women’s names (which are mostly goddess names).

  • Skáldic Poetry

There are two kennings for Loki in skáldic poetry that refer to him in relation to Sigyn. The first is farmr Sigynjar arma ‘burden of Sigyn’s arms’ from Haustlǫng by Þjóðólfr úr Hvini.

The second is farmr arma hafts galdrs, from Þórsdrápa by Eilífr Goðrúnarson from around the year 1000. This is a compound kenning, and it’s not certain that this is the order of the words; skáldic poetry has extremely open-ended sentence structure and words, which are marked for grammar by their ending, can appear in nearly any order, but in this case three of four words are in the genitive case making it impossible to determine the order by means of grammar. However it clearly follows the same pattern as Þjóðólfr’s Loki-kenning mentioned above. It seems interpretable ‘burden of the arms of (the) magic-deity’ (from haft, literally ‘fetter’ but often refers to the gods, especially in the plural hǫft) or ‘burden of the arms of (the) captive of magic’ (from haftr ‘prisoner, captive’).

On the Skáldic Poetry Project website, they’ve analyzed Eilífr’s verse completely differently, so that the kenning is farmr arma meinsvarra and translated ‘The cargo of the arms of the harm-woman,’ but this is so far unpublished and it’s not clear how the rest of the verse was analyzed (that is, what galdrs and hafts are supposed to mean in that case). 

  • The Gosforth Cross

The last is not a textual reference but rather the image carved on the Gosforth Cross, a stone cross in Gosforth, England, depicting scenes from Norse mythology, particularly from ragnarök:


These are all of the references that I have ever managed to find to Sigyn. It’s not impossible that I missed something, but here’s how I searched in case anyone wants to look for more: searched “Sigyn” and “Loki” on the Skáldic Poetry Project, searched “Sigyn”, “Sigynjar”, “Sigvin”, and “Sigvinjar” on the Árni Magnússon Institute’s database of Norse/Icelandic texts, looked up “Sigyn” in Finnur Jónsson’s version of Sveinbjörn Egilsson’s Lexicon Poeticum. That’s pretty thorough, but it would not turn up the Gosforth Cross for example, I just happened to know about that.

– Þorraborinn

Friendly signal boost/reminder that anything you see around the intarwebs about Sigyn and Loki’s meeting, Sigyn’s heritage, Sigyn as a daughter of Freyja, as one of the Vanir, as a foster daughter of Njord, as one of Odin’s Valkyrjur; these are all fabricated ideas. Perfectly fine ideas, of course, but not from the lore: the above snippets and examples are literally all we have on Sigyn. I you see anything about Sigyn’s characteristics or behavior, anything that’s more than just her name, it’s conjecture. These are the only things that can be sourced. The rest we are free to theorize upon.

Sigyn & UPG (cross post)

[Cross posted from a sideblog where it was originally posted on 24 Nov 2017.

While Kaldera’s Northern Paganism shrines and Krasskova’s older content about Sigyn (that I found to be useful despite her more recent beliefs) did play a role in how I came to find Sigyn and Norse polytheism in general, I found that I didn’t really experience Her ‘child bride’ Face. I was influenced by the ‘runaway adopted by Njord’ aspect, I must admit. I’m not sure where the Angrboda / Sigyn rivalry came from in some people’s upg, but I personally take a more polyamorous route with viewing Angrboda as a potential wife / partner to Loki.

I probably could dig up the pdf (ebooks) for RK and GK’s direct writing about this, but I honestly don’t really want to. Due to the few details from lore, I sort of just took a ‘live and let live’ approach whenever anyone talked about Sigyn for that reason. However, I didn’t want to lose an informative post that gets into differences between lore and upg in a portion of the tumblr blogosphere because of the tumblr purge.]

Ask: What can you tell me of Sigyn? I tried adding a * to her name in the tags but it’s mostly anime (as usual) and fashion blogs (??? Y tho ???) kemetiwitch-deactivated20180209





Surprisingly, not much, and not just because Sigyn isn’t on my radar, but because there’s not that much info on her on the lore and the only UPG I’ve seen on the subject is from Raven Kaldera and friends, and they have a bad habit of passing off their UPG as fact. GLE has a post regarding Sigyn’s relationship with Loki and whether or not it was abusive that mentions when Sigyn is referenced in the lore. 

Some UPG I have read:

Sigyn was a runaway who was adopted by Njord.

Sigyn is in conflict with Angrboda, who believes Loki should have married into his tribe. (Note that Angrboda is mentioned exactly once in the lore and her exact relationship to Loki is not talked about).

A lot of people (IME) focus on the bowl holder aspect of Sigyn, which makes sense because it’s one of the only times she’s mentioned as doing anything rather than the text just saying “oh, she’s Loki’s wife” but I think, like some of the other goddesses she has a strength to her that many of us moderns don’t see because she isn’t involved in battle or any “interesting” activities (ie. things that men like).

I would like to talk about something that I think is going to piss people off, and that’s the “child-bride” aspect that is in GK and Kaldera’s books (at least, that’s where I first heard it). I can’t help but find this line of thought to be sort of creepy in that it implies a) that Loki is a pedophile/hebephile, and it feels, to me at least, almost like they’re infantilizing her in the same way that mortal women are constantly referred to as “girls” and not given respect as adults. This isn’t the first time Kaldera has written some questionable things about goddesses. I should note that I say this as someone whose deities are frequently incestuous. 

She’s not a heathen really but @loptrcoptr / @daysoffuturepasta has some opinions about Sigyn and might be able to point you toward info about her.

As @kaynarune said, I’m not a practicing heathen, so I hope it would not be out of line for me to comment on Sigyn here.

As a non-practicing heathen, I don’t have any UPG to speak of; the closest I come to UPG is a wealth of opinions, based upon Eddic verse/symbolism/etc. As someone on the academic side of Norse religion, my whole world revolves around what the Eddas do, don’t and might say. For instance, there’s nothing in the Eddas about Njord as an adopted daddy figure, or tension and rivalry between Angurboda and Sigyn. Both are fine theories, because hey: make shit up, it’s a free world, have your own opinions. I personally like to think that Angurboda and Sigyn are in rather frequent communication, and that Sigyn’s beef is with Loki for stepping out, not with his “other woman”. This theory is held together by the ever-debated idea of Sigyn’s lineage: what manner of being is Sigyn? Snorri lists her among the Ásynjur present upon Gylfi’s visit in Gylfaginning, but does that really say anything about her lineage? Many of the Æsir gathered brides from among the Jǫtnar (Skadi, Gerd) who are considered Ásynjur, but what’s the number-one scandal in so many of the Eddic lays? a giant asking to marry a goddess. (Think of Freyja snorting so hard that the Brysingamen falls apart. Oh, the indignity.) And so we have to ask ourselves: Loki, though considered one of the Æsir, is still not “relieved” of his Jotunn background and is the only one of the gods who is addressed with a matronymic instead of patronymic (Loki Laufeyjarson), and the Vanir are not addressed with any outstanding funny monikers, so it stands to reason that Loki’s Jotunn heritage is not forgotten by anyone, ever. And no Jotunn has ever been allowed to marry a goddess. So Sigyn, by that logic, cannot be born into the Ásynjur. This is a theory that I ascribe to. But it begs the question, still: what is Sigyn? Surely she cannot be one of the Vanir, who the Æsir hold so near-and-dear, unlike Jotunn pals like Loki and Ægir? Is she a Jotunn, then? That’s my opinion, but we have no concrete proof, naturally. I’m also of the opinion that Nari and Vali are both her sons, and that she was there when they (or one of them) died. But that is entirely speculation, and as close to UPG as I get.

As far as this “child bride” thing is concerned…. I’ll try to react with some semblance of chill, but I find the notion blatantly appalling and crass. First of all, the only god we know to have had a childhood was Freyr, the only other kids we see are the gods’ kids and Thor’s servants, who are not gods. So what is Loki meant to have done, scooped up a little human girl from a happy little Midgard village, or did he rob a Jotunn cradle, is that it? ok, I lied, I can’t be chill about this, it’s idiotic and perverse, and there is zero evidence for it: none of the gods are shown to have child brides, why should Loki? Kaldera can come and fight me. And what is this in reaction to, the long-upheld notion of Sigyn as this figure of “devotion” and “innocence”, thus she must be childlike? Is that it? The Norse pantheon is made up of figures with many, many attributes, and quite a few of these deities even share attributes, yeah? (Freyr and Thor both take care of every-man farmers, etc.) but we know so very little about the Ásynjur (eternal bummer), and what we do know we gleaned largely from Snorri, who himself knew so little about them that he ascribed each woman one attribute alone, and some– like Sigyn– got none at all and remained unmentioned in his list (further proof for my Sigyn-is-a-Jotunn theory, but I digress). So let it be known that the notion of Sigyn as a goddess of fidelity, loyalty, innocence, or faith is an idea not presented in the Eddas, and one that stems largely, I would argue, from popular culture, ie: Marvel’s Sigyn is the “goddess of fidelity”. Viewing Sigyn as this pillar of sweet devotion is by no means wrong: you do you. But it is, I think, it’s own form of UPG, and I believe that we should all be careful when discussing Sigyn if we’re discussing her on an academic or religious platform and make certain we’re not slipping into our own opinions and stating them as fact: there are no facts about Sigyn. Like… really. Let’s look at the actual Sigyn facts:

1. She exists. Arguably.

2. She is cited as Loki’s wife in Lokasenna and in Snorri

3. She does her bowl thing

4. Nari and Vali (or whatever iterations of their names you prefer) are either both her sons, or one of them is

5. Sigyn is present in Gylfaginning

6. And that is literally it

Sigyn is a lacuna. It’s part of what I love about her: Sigyn can be anyone you want her to be. Woohoo! As far as scholarly theories on Sigyn go, there’s the question of her heritage and the possibility of Jotunn lineage, as I mentioned above. Also, it is a popular notion in scholarship (my Old Norse professor, who is extremely well known in the field, holds to this theory) that Sigyn is a late eddic character and not original to the myths. There are two parts to this argument, 1) why should Loki have such a nice wife to help him out? Some believe this is all Christian influence, others cite the influence of romantic epics, which brings us to part 2) the belief that Sigyn is a late influence derived from the character of Sigune in the romance Parzival, an early 13th century German romance. It is hard to hear that Sigyn could be a “late” invention, but that makes her role no less key or her lack of description no less interesting. In fact, the character of Sigune is very central in aiding and guiding Parzival on his journey, even giving him his “true” name (what is more Norse-lit than that)– a guiding soul who helps him out in his hours of need? Sounds like Sigyn to me! Not only that, but the act of name-giving could be used to argue for Sigyn’s role as a Valkyrja, methinks, if that is something that sounds good to you. But when the name-game is done, I have a counter for this theory of Sigyn as a “late” copy of Sigune: 1) find me an Old Norse name prefix more popular than “Sig”, and 2) even if Sigyn’s name could be proved to be a simple copy of Sigune’s, could it not be an equally simple name change? Couldn’t she be an older goddess with a new name attached? Or, to play devil’s advocate, maybe she does directly stem from this romance character and no others, we don’t rightly know. Even if she is “late”, it doesn’t take away from the fact that she is a Norse goddess ta the end of the day. My personal theory regarding her origins as a character is that Sigyn is also related very distantly (by extremely strained etymologies) to Sinthgunt of the second Merseburg charm, aiding Vuolla (Fulla) and Sunna, her sister (possibly Sól), but this is a theory I cannot prove. Yet. >:)

Like @answersfromvanaheim said, I think it’s easy for people to see nothingness, or even weakness, in Sigyn due to her lack of description, action, or agency in the Eddas. But I think it’s important, when looking at Sigyn as a figure and a person with motivations and senses, to wonder about her lone action, the only real glimpse we get of Sigyn: catching hissing venom in a precariously balanced bowl, keeping it from sliding down and melting the face of her husband, a husband who has been unfaithful, who has murdered, who has sown the seeds of anger amongst the gods; a husband who challenged a warrior-woman in cold blood to kill his son. And Sigyn waits there beside him, bowl in hand, as he writhes against chains wrought from her child, and she keeps him alive and holds the end of all things at bay. Why? We don’t know. What seems “weak” and “boring” about a woman like that?

Anyway, I hope adding some scholarly opinions to the pot helped answer the question a little. Maybe. Sorry if I babbled on too much! And @kemetiwitch, if you’re looking for more info/interpretations regarding Sigyn, you’re welcome to join the @sigyndefensesquad: it’s a place for Sigyn lovers and their theories, be they devotees or fans. And if there’s anything I said that was confusing or unclear, i am always around and happy to talk about Sigyn at any time. 🙂

Like I said, she has opionions on this matter. 😉

Old Norse Name ‘Sigyn’

[Cross posted from a sideblog. Originally posted on 16 Sept 2016 and tagged #Lady of Knots.]


Nobody requested this one, probably because here is a standard, generally accepted interpretation that seems far less controversial than many other mythological names or words. Personally, I disagree with that interpretation, or at least the idea that we can be fully confident in it.

Typically the name is taken to be a compound of sigr ‘victory’ and a feminine equivalent to the word vinr m. ‘friend’ so that it means literally ‘victory-(female) friend’. The word sigr ‘victory’ is extremely common in compounded personal names and often, though not always, loses its stem-final r, such as in Sigurðr, Sigrún(where the r is part of the word rún), Sigfǫðr (a name of Óðinn, ‘victory-father’).

1. -yn: ‘(female) friend’ or something else?

The ‘(female) friend’ component comes from -yn, believed to be contracted from an earlier -vin, so that the original name was *Sigvin. I don’t believe it’s attested in that form, but it is a well enough attested alternation, such as in Bjǫrgyn ~ Bjǫrgvin ‘Bergen, Norway’. In my opinion there is a major obstacle to this etymology, which is the genitive of the name, Sigynjar (or perhaps *Sigvinjar). It appears in the genitive fairly frequently (because of its use in kennings for Loki) and I have never found an example without the j (that is, a consonantal “i” in manuscripts). The Old Icelandic word for an explicitly female friend is vina, and there is no trace of a word *vin, genitive *vinjar, with that meaning. There is an Old High German winia, but a hypothetical Old Icelandic cognate would be *vinja, genitive *vinju, and it seems unreasonable to propose yet another word meaning ‘(female) friend’ alongside an already existing word solely for the purposes of explaining one name, especially when there are other, much more likely explanations available.

There IS a word vin ~ vinjar, meaning ‘meadow’. It isn’t unthinkable that this could be the -yn in Sigyn, as Loki’s mother’s name Laufey also seems to refer to an element of landscape. Anatoly Liberman believes that Loki was originally a chthonic deity, and if that is true it might make some sense that his wife would be as well, but this is definitely a long way from certain, and there are not really very strong signs of Sigyn being inherently chthonic herself other than that she stays with Loki while he is chained up. Is that enough to go on? Maybe, but I personally think there are better possibilities.

There is no particularly compelling reason to believe that -yn must have come from an earlier -vin. It’s not impossible, but there’s no reason it couldn’t just come from a regular -yn. The y could have come by i-umlaut of a Proto-Norse *u, so *-unju > -yn or *-wunju > *-yn.

A Proto-Norse *unju has been proposed as a feminine name-forming suffix (equivalent to masculine *-unaz which has been proposed for jǫtunn, a possibly *Óðunn, and more) also appearing in Fjǫrgyn and Hlóðyn, and possibly extended into a longer Old Norse suffix –ynja that may have had a small amount of productivity in forming feminine equivalents to masculine words, such as ásynja ‘goddess (female áss), apynja ‘female monkey (api), ljónynja ‘lioness’, and karlynja (a weird word for ‘woman’ derived from karl ‘man’ in the Icelandic version of Genesis). It is controversial, however, as alternatives have been proposed for both Fjǫrgyn and Hlóðyn. Since Fjǫrgyn and Hlóðyn are alternate names for Jǫrð (‘earth’/the earth goddess), an ending vin f. ‘meadow’ actually does seem possible for both of them.

A Proto-Norse *wunju does not have any attested reflexes in Nordic languages (if not Sigyn), but would be cognate to Old English wyn(n) f. ‘joy’, which is also the name of the w-rune ᚹ. It is almost definitely related to Icelandic words like yndi n. ‘joy’. It is used in compounded personal names in Old English such as Ælfwynn.

Personally, I believe that of the several possibilities, a word cognate to Old English wynn is the most likely explanation, given that:

  1. we actually know it existed, even if in Old English rather than Old Norse — still better than an entirely hypothetical construct like *vin ‘girl-friend’
  2. there is precedence for its use in compounded personal names
  3. Sigyn does not show very strong signs of being an earth goddess like Fjǫrgyn/Hlóðyn which would increase the likelihood of vin f. ‘meadow’ (although this can’t be ruled out entirely), and that depends on the very speculative (and not widely accepted as far as I know) proposal that Fjǫrgyn and Hlóðyn are formed in such a way.
  4. If Fjǫrgyn and Hlóðyn are formed with an ending inherited from Indo-European (so that Fjǫrgyn is cognate to Lithuanian Perkūnė) then that is also a strong contender for Sigyn, but that is wrought with controversy and may not have actually existed.

2. Revisiting sig-

As mentioned above, sig- meaning ‘victory’ is a very common name element, and as such the fact that Sigyn is nowhere connected to victory in the preserved corpus of Norse mythology isn’t a problem. Nobody ever said that every deity must have a name relating to what they do, just that it’s very often the case. In fact, sometimes names go unchanged even after they become outdated and irrelevant, perhaps preserving a small piece of an earlier body of mythology.

However there is another word sig in Old Norse that could, without straining very hard, relate to Sigyn as we know her from the mythology, which Ásgeir Blöndal Magnússon, in his Icelandic etymological dictionary, linked to Sigyn.

sig (2) n. is a rope that people use to rappel down a rock face or into a pit, or a rope with weights on the ends to hold something down. Either of the two uses of the word is mythologically relevant; the former because she likely had to physically descend (síga, p.part. sigat) beneath Hveralundr where Loki was tied down, and the latter because she cares for Loki while he is held down by ropes (sig).

For a goddess who receives very little attention in the Norse myths as we have them, Sigyn is distinguished by a remarkably early mention in the 9th century poem Haustlǫng, wherein Loki is called “the burden of Sigyn’s arms”. Therefore we know that already at a very early time – probably around 200 years before Vǫlsupá and over 400 years before Snorri’s commentary, Sigyn played an important role in Loki’s story, and this is further supported by the Gosforth cross:

Although there are plenty of reasons to believe that the story of Ragnarök as told by Snorri and even by Vǫluspá had changed substantially from earlier versions, Loki’s binding and Sigyn’s attending to him seems to have been very stable. I think that it’s very reasonable to identify the sig- element in Sigyn’s name with a rope, whether used for physical descent or tying down.

3. What does it mean?

I don’t think that what I’ve said here provides enough evidence to propose a translation exactly. The two elements I’m proposing are most likely are sig ‘rope for descending; weighted rope for holding things down’ and -*yn, a reflex of PGmc *wunjō ‘joy’.

Another possibility, though I think less likely and less demonstrably supportable, would be sig- and a reflex of *-unjō, which would probably mean something like ‘goddess of/relating to sig (‘rope’)’.

It’s also important to note that while I think my objections against identifying the second element -yn as meaning ‘(female) friend’ are strong, my rejection of sig- as ‘victory’ is not nearly as certain, especially given its extremely common use in personal names, not only in Old Norse but in many Germanic languages, including Old Norse/Icelandic Signý, a name often substituted for Sigyn in manuscripts (presumably because the scribe was unfamiliar with the name Sigyn and thought an error had been made in the manuscript that was being copied).


  • Ásgeir Blöndal Magnússon. 1989. Íslensk orðsifjabók. Reykjavík: Orðabók Háskolans.
  • Cleasby, Richard and Guðbrandur Vigfússon. 1874. An Icelandic-English Dictionary. Oxford: The Clarendon Press.
  • Krahe, Hans and Wolfgang Meid. 1969. Germanische Sprachwissenschaft. vol. 2: “Formenlehre”. Berlin: de Gruyter.
  • Lehman, Winifred P. 1986. A Gothic Etymological Dictionary. Leiden: Brill. (on the name Fjǫrgyn)
  • Simek, Rudolf. 1993. Dictionary of Northern Mythology. trans. Angela Hall. Cambridge: D.S. Brewer. (for the “standard accepted definition”, also listed on Wikipedia, citing Andy Orchard)

“Some of us are monsters”

[Cross posted from a sideblog. Originally tagged #Lady in the Cave, #Wolf mode. Not backdating because it was posted before this WP blog existed (1 Dec 2013).]


Some of us are monsters.

You do not walk out of the darkness unchanged. If you look in the mirror and still think human, fine. Hold on to what you will. But some of us have never walked in the light. I have no desire to file down my teeth and clip my claws just to make people comfortable. They are all I have ever known.

(via red-voche-deactivated20170805)

Source: saintstrange

Human Hunger

[Cross posted and backdated from a sideblog. Originally posted on 28 Nov 2013 and tagged #encouragement, #Lady of Untying (emotional vulnerability, human fragility, feeling, etc.).]

Your needs don’t make you too much. They don’t make you selfish or weak or greedy. They make you human. We all have needs. And those hungers aren’t something we should feel ashamed of. They’re normal, we didn’t get enough of them as children hungers. Affections we’ve been deprived of by the people who are supposed to care for us. Connections we needed to feel whole and spaces we needed to feel safe. Cravings we’ve been taught we didn’t deserve. Appetites we’ve learned to suppress and fill with guilt. Again and again we’ve neglected our needs because we’ve been taught that they were too much— that we were too much. But we don’t have to any longer. You don’t have to. Whether you need support, alone time, affection, connection, validation, or reassurance that you are loved — it is more than okay to ask for what you need. Making your needs known isn’t about being demanding or selfish. It’s about self-care. It’s about creating a safer space for yourself. It’s about using your voice and speaking your truth. It’s about giving yourself permission to take up space. It’s about listening to your hungers and honoring them. It’s about honoring yourself.

Daniell Koepke  (via internal-acceptance-movement) (via littlerestlessone)

Submissives & Rolequeer (cross post)

[Cross posted and backdated from a sideblog. Originally posted on 13 Nov 2017 and tagged #community.]



“switch” or as I like to call it: “we’re both subs so someone’s gotta dom”

Random info dump, sorry some of these posts are very dense and complex:

Because I’ve spend a while thinking ‘two subs’ was a failed relationship and it took me a while to realize that it’s totally the best kind of relationship.

Like, it’s playing with power without a person in the room who gets off on having the power to violate consent. What’s not to love?

(Disclaimer: I have read, debated and blogged A LOT about BDSM. If you send me a BDSM 101 post about how it’s ‘totally not about violating consent’ I will info dump very hard. So how about cutting out me as the probably rude middle man and starting here: )